then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
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