so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Randomize
