Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
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