its not stalking. its research.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
