why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
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