Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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