do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
