Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
Reason #84 I'm on my way to becoming a crazy cat lady: I called the police last night because I heard a noise and the cats were acting funny like they were trying to tell me something. The 3rd time the dispatcher repeated "the cats are acting funny?" I yelled and told her to have an officer ask the cats what happened.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
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