I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
Randomize
