never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Two ladies just showed up with my fucking purse. It was in the fucking street. I'm a train wreck. As a financial advisor, this shouldn't happen. I should be an adult.
I have bruises all over my body. Seriously, I'm a train wreck. I'm too damn old for hangovers like this.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
