he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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