She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Randomize
