it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
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