Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
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