My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
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not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
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do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set