I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Randomize