the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize
