I need help removing her.
she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
Randomize