Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
Randomize
