either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize
