can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
Randomize
