using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
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