girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
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