I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Randomize