dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
Be still, my beating vagina.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
Randomize
