it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
