hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
