Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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