It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
Randomize
