People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
You called yourself Captain Aspirin and then tried to cure my headache by shoving pills up my nose. Fuck you becoming a nurse, you can't take care of me while you're drunk ever again. Ever.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Randomize
