Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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