Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
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