I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
Randomize