recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OPIZZABONMYDICK
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize