You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
