then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
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