can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
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