official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Randomize
