I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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