summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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