It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
How external is "for external use only"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
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