Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
She told me I should be a condom model.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
