At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
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