those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
Randomize
