Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
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