Tell her she can't have a vagina
I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
