She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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