he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
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