too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
