Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Randomize
