I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
This is the high leading the old right now
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He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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